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Long Distance Cyber Relationship - Long distance relationships and online relationship | ||
Discussion by haxored with 24 Replies.
Last Update: May 24, 2010, 12:42 pm | |||
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I met my girlfriend on the internet 6 years ago, that was 30th of August 2002. Most people in my city are indulged in this so called, IRC chats (since YM wasn't so famous back then). Me and my friends own a channel in a certain IRC server and that's where our lives are everyday, every free time.
One morning (after a whole night of partying) before going to sleep and still sober, I visited our channel to have a bit of chat. My ex-girlfriend was there, we greeted each other "mahal, kumusta na? (Love, how are you?)" (the way we greet each other when we're still lovers). We havent seen each other for so long since she and her family migrated to US few months ago. Then one chatter PM'd me asking, "If I were your girlfriend, what would you call me?" and I replied, "I'll call you Baby". We became cyber lovers on that very moment (around 5 mins of talking). Since then we communicate thru chat, txt and call. After a month, we met personally, we kissed and hugged each other like we've seen each other before. We never knew how each of us looked, but maybe we felt true love so it didn't matter anymore. We we're students that time (2nd year in college), and we are 200miles apart.
We've had alot of hardwork to make the relationship work. Alot of misunderstandings, quarrels and lapses. But we believed in each other, fought for our love and prayed for God's guidance.
Today my girlfriend is already a Computer Engineer and I am a businessman and an IT professional. We still love each other, and we're currently building our own house. We planned to marry next year, hoping to have 4 kids and I hope everything will go as we have dreamed of.
So who said long distance relationships don't work? Who said that cyber relationships falter?
It really depends upon the people involved, if you work out on love, then maybe you'll find true love no matter the distance no matter the barrier.
it's really surprising that there are long distance relationships that do end up, as the cliche goes, "happily ever after" (that is before the marriage, not after--you know, like how telenovelas usually end up
and no, i'm not a telenovela freak 
). usually when people say "long distance relationship", it is usually "doomed long before it has even started". the physical distance disconnects the emotions attached between the lovers. thank goodness for technology which helps us to get reconnected with our loved ones that has been separated for some time. not so long ago, people have to wait for a long time before they're able to get their reply via snail mail. telephones give the "presence" factor, but at the expense of your pocket money. when email was discovered, it became a huge milestone for communication. in just a click of a button, you'll be able to send your mail and expect a reply within minutes.your story says it all: constant communication helps a relationship bloom despite the geographical separation. as most people say "to keep the love burning". personally i don't know how that feels, but this isn't about me, so whatever, right?
congratulations to you and your other half.
In your case, not only was it a cyber relationship but you also had the additional hurdle of distance to overcome. I wish you and your partner well and hope you have a long and happy future together.
QUOTE (tuddy)
And how old are you both? Country? and do you both have non-e boyfriends girlfriends??? Could be a very interesting sitiaution come time to meet. I say stick to your local area, and provide yourself with a real test, if they wait until they get to come see you, then you know it's only a good thing. I certainly wouldn't be saying no to someone who lives locally for someone over 5,000ks away.Link: view Post: 310056
Ah, I know it sounds absolutely nutters.
We are both 17. I've had previous boyfriends, and a couple "opportunities" to leave and have an offline relationship since we've been together... believe it or not this isn't a case of a couple of kids who can't get any IRL. I'm pretty picky about who I date, not in the usual sense of "high standards" -I'm not looking for some hot rich football player- but more that there's specific set of personality traits a person has to have before I even think of them in that way. Most people don't come close, but he fits them pretty much perfectly, and he feels the same way about me (or so I'm told ). It's absolutely horrible that we live so far apart, but them's the breaks, and I'm not the sort to jump ship and hope for the best. If we get a chance to meet, it will be because we've worked towards that goal together, not because I've given up on things.So while I totally understand your concern, its the sort of situation you don't really "get" until you're there yourself. Trust me, a year and a half ago I'd have said the same as you.
EDIT: I live in west coast Canada; he is in the UK.
Didn't notice that part before.
Living in two different countries is the hardist part, mainly cause it will cause one of you great expense to see the other or in the end eventuallity who moves to whos home town to live happily ever after...
-reply by CeciLeah
i hope you support me...
please...
Long Distance Cyber Relationship
I am Clark from the Philippines. I am 21 years old. My girl broke up with me 3 weeks ago because she's so tired of our way of communication. We were on a long distance relationship. How can I get her back that she is standing firm on her decision never to get back with me again?
-reply by Clark
Admin Opinion
Everything in life happens for a reason my friend. Just accept what happened and just by heart, pray for her happiness. After all you really loved her, Correct?
Talk to her and be good friends with her. Respect her decision and move on in life :-)
-Shree (trap17.com)
no offense
He is from the UK and I'm from Mexico, we met on myspeace about 2 years ago, became really good friends, actually my best friend, I talked to him about everything that came to my mind, eventually after a year I fell in love with him, something I thought shouldnt have happened, I couldnt keep it anymore, and told him...Turned out he was in love with me too and for the first time he put his webcam and asked me out, I couldnt help myself and said yes. In august 7th we'll have been dating for 4 months, thats a little time I know. But by now we have talked about growing old together, having kids, getting married, moving to another country together...We are really into each other.. The problem is.. I love him so much, but he is so far away, and I think its not fair for him, he could meet another girl there that can kiss him and hug him, and I just can type what I feel, which isnt the same. I also thought, my english speaking isnt really good so he would have to deal with it, and I just feel I'm not good enough for him.Yes I have told him how I feel about it, but he says if we stop dating it would be a waste of time when we could be showing each other how much we love. And then he uses his webcam and mic, and I don't (I have panic using it, weird I know) and he says thats fine, but I feel like I should do something else.I was thinking maybe the best would be to break up and if when we meet he still feels something for me we can start dating again... I really love him, and if it wasnt for that I would never break up with him. But I want the best for him and I don't think thats with me, its with someone that can show him how much she loves him in person... So what should I do.. Can someone give me an advise? please I really need it.P.S. I'm 17 and he is 19, I'll turn 18 on october and he 20 on december in case you want to know-reply by abigail s.
Who can resist these men...I have been e-loving one for the last 4 months. I think my intense feelings are scaring him away. We met on line accidently and have never met in person. I think he is somehow part of this British fetish I have going on. But I know one thing for sure, I'll eventually find what I need in a man.
My reply to abigail s. Is that no love is stronger than latin love...So I have heard from extremely happy people who are in a relationship with them. And, nobody is more accepting of differences involving their women than these wonderful British men either. You are at a precarious time in your relationship and you are experiencing self doubts. Just wait it out and I am sure you will feel different soon. If you don't, then you will know your decision is the right one. Don't sacrifice your feelings like some romantic martyr; you are important too.
A word of warning...It is hard to say no to these guys.. So don't do anything you would regret..He will still love you and respect you even more. And he will wait. The fact that it has lasted this long is a good sign. You just have to decide if this is going to be enough for you for the time it takes to finish school, etc. If both of you get your degrees, then you can at the minimum get a job is what ever foreign country you decide to move to.
-reply by lovesukmentoo
hey there people...Well , talking about cultural dif. Ive got 2 stories related to that:
April 2007: I met this guy in a chat site , I'm latinamerican , He Is from Turkey... We got into an e-romance for 5 months or so , until he decided to leave everything and come to my country and stay with me ...Even tho I didn't feel that was true love ( I ve been involved in normal face to face relationships my whole life , so it was something new for me )
Sept 2007: He sold everything to get money enough to come here and start a new life...
Unfortunately for us... Cultural difference was too much , hes muslim , I'm agnostic. I'm single mom , he was a virgin. And so on...
We broke up like 18 months ago or so and still we are best friends on earth :)
Let me tell you. Culture is way too important , if u wanna get involved in a e.Relationship with a foreigner...Ah well , learn A LOT abt his / her culture BEFORE u met up...
1 year ago I met this other guy...Hes an american guy , and , might sound funny but , I can see that our lifestyles, plans , way of living, and many MANY other things are so similar...Even tho we are a continent far away :) . My english its just enough to talk...Spoken , its same story...We try to go on video calls everyday jst to know "how was your day" and now I'm moving there in a few months,...I love him...Really I do! and so far I can see he loves me as well.. .. Most of his family already knows about me and whats he planning ( ahem...Yeah , wedding!! yay!!)
I know some of his friends might think I'm using him to get a "green card" , since I'm latin, hes american and that whole jugdamental oppinions abt this kind of relationship...I don't give a damn!! I'm an engineer and earn good enough money here , So I'm not willing to go to states for a "better life"...A better life form e will be with HIM...He has nothing but his loving heart...And I don't care ...And he cant move over here bcoz he doesnt speak spanish at alll :D...Ah! except when he says "Te Amo!!" (how cuuuute aww)
So, does love have any kind of borders? I don't think so , Is it like gambling?Well you might find stupid people , nice people , liers and cheaters and honest people...But...Doesnt that happen in REAL LIFE as well?? I know ;)
Sorry abt my english !! I do my best :)
Best luck to ya all!!
-reply by Alejandra
-reply by Dyuweh
This was a great story and it's given me encouragement! To know that it works out for others is wonderful! I hope you don't mind if I tell a little story I have that is very similar.I met a boy about two years ago. We met on a site called neoseeker. A video game advise site. We became friends and start fake dating quickly after we met. And then we got fake married and had fake kids. It was cute and very fun. But he kinda broke my heart six months later because he was to afraid of commitment. I didn't know that at the time and blamed myself. Because I had done something we both thought wouldn't happen. I really fell in love with him. I was heart broken for months. I was also going through a bad teenage stage in my life so that's why I was so depressed. He had started fake dating one of my best online friends just a week after he broke up with me. But to my surprise he broke up with her two months later and then two months after that asked me out again. And it was really fun. We had started voice chatting over our the ds wi-fi connection using pokemon diamond to voice chat. And we had also finally shown each other our pictures. But for some reason he broke up with me a couple of months after we got back together. I was shattered again.. I couldn't believe it. And once again after us not being together for just a few weeks he started dating my same friends again.It's been more than six months since they started dating. And since then we have started webcaming and talking on the phone. He's working on telling his parents about me. And I'm working on going down to Florida to visit him this summer. We've never met.I am not sure if I still love him.. Recently my feelings have changed from undying love to confused.. But he now claims to love me even though he's still dating our friend. He says he knows who he wants to marry.Now I know this story seems childish but we're both 16 and in 10th grade. Sky has a great plan for his future is a a straight A student going to Finland next year to study over there. Depending on when we meet this summer and how we maintain our relationship while he's over seas we might just start really dating.I feel like if things work out and we start dating he will be the boy I marry. It's still to early to say that but still I have a feeling.Thank you so much for reading my little story. A story so very important to me. I hope you enjoyed it
-reply by AirheadedAngel
That's cute, I am very happy for the both of you. I hope things work out the same way for me, I've always had a feeling that I would meet my future husband on the internet. If it works out that way or not it's good to know that some long distance relationships/cyber relationships do work out.
-About 5 months ago, around November I was just killing time, chatting to random people on this other chat site when I bumped into someone, real special and it happened without me knowing lol. The site is very small but its getting popular by the day. It doesn't show anything and people just go there to chat with a random stranger. After failing to strike convo with about ten people, I was fed up and was just about to jump off when I met the girl who's my current gf.
We had an amazing chat and right off the bat, we connected. I had never felt like that in my entire life!! You know finally find someone who you can truly talk to and she hollers back in the same breath, you forget all about distance. i was too overjoyed and the next day I proposed. She was shocked herself but I maintained I meant it even though at the time I didn't really and we started dating. It was wonderful, awesome for the first few months before her parents discovered she was having an e-relationship and crushed the party.
Now it's like 2 years since the parents intervened but now we're dating again!! we met last year and one thing led to another...now we got two cute babies but we aint married because she has to finish school and I'm staying far from home right now.
Internet is all about meeting people and how the relationships end, is your decision. I'm happy to have met this baby and hopefully, we'll spend the rest of our days together.
I guess if you made 2 cute babbies that means you should have either twins meaning you beea seing her physically for over 10 months or or if the kids are not twins the that wopuld mean you been physically seeing each other for over 20 months. That also means your e-relationship has turned out quite well as you probably have got to know each other so much better in this time cause most relationships would have failed by now.
I'd say in your book e-dating has actually worked out well for you and I wish you all the best.
I sortof had an internet dating thingy going on but it got complicated and I quit. Basically I meat this woman online and we clicked and we sortof started exchanging emails and all that. The emails and the chats had that connection and I would look forward to her mails every morning we would exchange stories etc and I thought i was getting to know her and was being open about the things i wanted in a relatioship. She would ask me what my ideas were on marriage and dating and how I judge people or all that and I was honest but then she dropped a bombshell on me she said She had the same beliefs as i did but then had omitted something before. I asked what that was and she told me she was married. The reason why she didnt tell me before is because in her view her wedding was over shortly after it started she claimed her husband changed over night and became a drunk and constantly domestically abused her he would shake the sh*t out of her because he cant hit her lest she rings the cops on him. SHe claimed that the whole marriage was like a prison and she wanted to get free of it. The story obviously escalated to her wanting to run away from him and move to me because she was now in love with me and wanted to have my babies because we felt so right together. Now this was a shock to me because I suddenly thought whooaaaaa whats happening here Im not in love and Im certainly not ready for someoens wife to run from her matrimonial home in America, fly to UK and live with me just on a notion that we clicked on emails hence we will click physically and emotionally.
I dont know if i did wrong but I didnt want her to ad me to her list of he changed overnight boyfriends because we didnt really know each other outside of what we chose to write about each other. FOr christs sake I thought I knew er well in the sic months we talked I had no clue she was MRS SOMEONE so I realised she could hae ommited loads of other things too. Like maybe she was a golddigger marrying people for money or those serial brides who marry you, wipe your accounts and dissappear without even a divorce. So for me E-Dating isnt quite glamorous
My relationship is only weeks old, but it seems to be going very well.
I'm from the eastern US, and she is from Japan. I'm 32 & she is 38.
We consider each other boyfriend & girlfriend, we have promised absolute loyalty to one another, and she has gone out of her way to stay up night after night after night, & chat with me all night long (her time). & I have these cyber chat 6-8hr conversations with her all day while I'm working, using laptop & mobile. God bless google chat & I'm sure skype will come into the relationship soon enough. I kinda feel bad, as we both are business professionals & work daylight, her a teacher & me a travel professional. But she is a grown woman, and I guess if she wants to stay up for me, I can't say no. She says she finds time to sleep....so ok. From day one she has stayed with me all day, we are talking 9am to 4-5pm EST. I never asked her for this but love that she does it. Being we are both adults & professionals, we both believe we can travel to see each other maybe once a year each way for few weeks, until we decide to take the next step to marriage....which we have discussed. You can imagine we talk about everything with 8hr chats. We have even already told each others parents about our long distance relationship. We've discussed what the future can possibly hold for us together.
We have exchanged physical addresses & all forms of communication to each other. We rely on her nights to converse as talking on her mobile during teaching hours is prohibited, so even if she wanted to talk during her daytimes its nearly impossible. & when I leave the office for the day, she tells me to get my rest, sleep well & we will talk again tomorrow. I've talked more to this woman in the last couple weeks, than I have anyone else on this earth over my life so far, except my family. Even my previous real relationships we never talked this much.
I never in my life thought I would love an older woman. I do prefer asian girls as a preference, but never dated one before now.
I always thought with my asian professional specialization, & personal studying of the language/culture over the past two/three years. That ok maybe I will find a younger (mid-20's) asian girl & fall in love....if I can get myself over there to meet one.
We both are surprised we have fallen for one another so hard, so quickly, & we both feel we can make this work.
Being distance while still a minor issue, we don't see as a major hurdle.
Wish us luck!
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