123 replies to this topic

[DeathLock]

i personally dont think its bad to cheat on ur mate as long as u dont let he/she find out...because cheating on your mate might just be the thing that keeps you two together...and what he/she doesnt know wont hurt he/she ...i mean like for instance...a friend of mine went out for a girl for almost 2-3 years and they cheated on each other the whole time but never got caught and they had a great relationship...they ended up braking up in the end because she had to move away...but they still keep in touch and hook up every once in awhile lol...but if ur married then u should not cheat no way!...or if ur going out with someone u can picture spending ur life with u shouldnt cheat either...thats just my opinion...what do u guys think?

[quiksilver]

DeathLock, on Jul 1 2005, 06:00 PM, said:

and what he/she doesnt know wont hurt he/she

no, but syphilis might. Or herpies.
Not telling your girlfriend/boyfriend that you cheated on them is lying and it puts them at risk.

[clagnol]

There are lots of ways for your partner to find out. The last time I dated two girls simultaneously, one of them found out from a mutual friend. This wasn't cheating, mind you, as I was not exclusive with either girl. But sometimes you'd rather just keep certain details to yourself.

[rejected]

I'm totally against cheating in relationships, I'd be crushed if I found out my girlfriend was cheating on me. What someone doesn't know won't hurt them, but what happens when they do find out? I wouldn't go out with someone and then be that unfaithful! That's the whole reason of being in a relationship is to be together, to have commitment and that trust that you feel for your partner.

And as quiksilver said, what would happen if you get an STD, or some disease from the person you're cheating with? Your partner would find out and then you have some nasty disease on you that may stay with you your whole life.

In my opinion, cheating is dead wrong and shouldn't occur ever.

[Johnny]

Cheating is bad. Period. It just causes way too much stress, distrust, and general badness. O.o

[apopguru]

Cheating is a bad thing. It hurts you even though you don't know it and if your partner finds out then you are in even worse trouble,

My advice is don't do it

[Joshua]

I've thought before on where the idea of "cheating" originates from. Is it because people are trying to have the blessings of marriage without the responsibilities and institution God created to go with them?

Long story short, I think it's because we treat dating as marriage is supposed to be treated, with much the same level of intimacy (I assume it doesn't involve sex, it still involves hugging and kissing and levels of intimacy and bonding) yet without the protections of marriage and the responsibilities/bond that marriage brings. You're expecting another to be tied to you when they have never made the official commitment to do so.

Also, because there is no level of patience or waiting, of commitment without satisfaction, the relationship is devalued and people base their commitment to the other person on how they feel and what pleasure it brings them without caring about the other person.

So what is being cheated on if there was never a commitment made on which to be cheated? As soon as the person feels the "magic" of the relationship, or what they could get out of it, is gone, they too are gone. I see it as something like sex. As they say, having sex before marriage only serves to put you on the used car lot.

I'm sure I've just offended about 9 of 10 people who will read this post Sorry, just my opinions

[hulunes]

personally,no one would like to cheat on other.maybe exiting some true lie,they can not help but to cheat.

however i dont like...especially on parents and friends.

[clagnol]

jzyehoshua, on Jul 1 2005, 10:05 PM, said:

I've thought before on where the idea of "cheating" originates from.  Is it because people are trying to have the blessings of marriage without the responsibilities and institution God created to go with them?

No, it has nothing to do with religion, whatsoever.

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Long story short, I think it's because we treat dating as marriage is supposed to be treated, with much the same level of intimacy (I assume it doesn't involve sex, it still involves hugging and kissing and levels of intimacy and bonding) yet without the protections of marriage and the responsibilities/bond that marriage brings.

Hugging and kissing? Wow...

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Also, because there is no level of patience or waiting, of commitment without satisfaction, the relationship is devalued and people base their commitment to the other person on how they feel and what pleasure it brings them without caring about the other person. 

That's quite a logical leap, jzye. So a man cheats on his girlfriend (and vice versa) because there is no little slip of paper stating their legal and financial ties? I think you should give this little theory of yours some more thought.

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So what is being cheated on if there was never a commitment made on which to be cheated?

I very much recommend you do not use this line when you start dating girls.

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As they say, having sex before marriage only serves to put you on the used car lot.

Who says this? Do you think you are better than us used cars for never having touched the road? Well, I hate to break it to you, but even new cars are tested to make sure they work. You aren't a new car, you are a car that hasn't even left the assembly line, for fear that you'll get a little dent before someone buys you.

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I'm sure I've just offended about 9 of 10 people who will read this post   Sorry, just my opinions

What you really did was hijack a thread about cheating and turn it into a sermon against the evils of sex before marriage. I understand that you feel strongly about this, and I can empathize, as I once shared your views, when I was a child. But there is a difference between sharing your opinions and blurting them out during an unrelated conversation.

And for future reference, when you realize that you are offending 9 out of 10 people, perhaps it's best just not to post at all, lest you be labelled a troll.

[twentyinches631]

Ehh, clagnol let him say what he wants. He is entitled. I'm not offended. To get back to the topic though, cheating is definitely not something you would want to do. And you can call it trying to be married without actually being married if you want but I love my girlfriend and I wouldn't even want to see anyone else beside her, nor would I want to hurt her by doing so.

Dating for most people I think is trying to find that special girl or guy you wanna spend the rest of your life with. If you prove that you can't be faithful (ie cheat) then you will never keep a mate. They also have a saying "once a cheater always a cheater"... but I don't believe that. Many people do however, so cheating will get you nowhere fast.