A guy called Steve dies and goes to heaven. He is stood at the pearly gate and recieved a harp and a halo off St. Patrick. He enters heaven and sees many other people with harps and halos, but one man had something diffrent. He had a keg of beer and a gorgeous naked woman with him. Steve was furious, all he got was a harp and a halo. So steve visits St. Patrick complaining about the man. St. Patrick reassures Steve and tells him this man is being punished. Steve cant believe what he is hearing, how is that a punishment? St. Patrick explains, Well the beer barrel has a hole in it and the woman doesnt!
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#2
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Posted 20 July 2005 - 01:43 AM
Brown bear, on Jul 20 2005, 09:45 AM, said:
A guy called Steve dies and goes to heaven. He is stood at the pearly gate and recieved a harp and a halo off St. Patrick. He enters heaven and sees many other people with harps and halos, but one man had something diffrent. He had a keg of beer and a gorgeous naked woman with him. Steve was furious, all he got was a harp and a halo. So steve visits St. Patrick complaining about the man. St. Patrick reassures Steve and tells him this man is being punished. Steve cant believe what he is hearing, how is that a punishment? St. Patrick explains, Well the beer barrel has a hole in it and the woman doesnt!
ha ha ha nice one....How about this...
A young good looking girl phone me yesterday and said, "Come on over no body was home, I came over and no body was home...
"
#4
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Posted 10 August 2005 - 09:10 AM
Hmm... I saw the description about blasphemy but I don't even see a real scene here...
1) Where does the idea of halos enter into in the Bible?
2) Why would some guy named Patrick be at the entrance? Isn't Christ the One who says "Well done, thou good and faithful servant"?
3) I don't see anything about a pearly gate in the Bible being the point of judgement, rather there's a day of judgement where Christ on the throne judges all, and you enter in if your name is in the Book of Life, else you're cast into the Lake of Fire.
4) Judging by Luke 20:35 there is no marriage in Heaven so why the guy would have a girl "given" to him I'm not sure.
5) Judging by Habakkuk 2:15 there's a curse on those giving others strong drink, meaning God wouldn't give the guy beer.
6) Punishment involves the Lake of Fire, the opposite is Heaven. The Bible speaks even of Hell as being separated by a gulf that no man can cross (Luke 16:26). It nowhere speaks of punishment in Heaven.
And to top it all off, isn't blasphemy against God specificially?
1) Where does the idea of halos enter into in the Bible?
2) Why would some guy named Patrick be at the entrance? Isn't Christ the One who says "Well done, thou good and faithful servant"?
3) I don't see anything about a pearly gate in the Bible being the point of judgement, rather there's a day of judgement where Christ on the throne judges all, and you enter in if your name is in the Book of Life, else you're cast into the Lake of Fire.
4) Judging by Luke 20:35 there is no marriage in Heaven so why the guy would have a girl "given" to him I'm not sure.
5) Judging by Habakkuk 2:15 there's a curse on those giving others strong drink, meaning God wouldn't give the guy beer.
6) Punishment involves the Lake of Fire, the opposite is Heaven. The Bible speaks even of Hell as being separated by a gulf that no man can cross (Luke 16:26). It nowhere speaks of punishment in Heaven.
And to top it all off, isn't blasphemy against God specificially?
#5
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Posted 10 August 2005 - 10:18 AM
jzyehoshua, on Aug 10 2005, 02:40 PM, said:
Hmm... I saw the description about blasphemy but I don't even see a real scene here...
1) Where does the idea of halos enter into in the Bible?
2) Why would some guy named Patrick be at the entrance? Isn't Christ the One who says "Well done, thou good and faithful servant"?
3) I don't see anything about a pearly gate in the Bible being the point of judgement, rather there's a day of judgement where Christ on the throne judges all, and you enter in if your name is in the Book of Life, else you're cast into the Lake of Fire.
4) Judging by Luke 20:35 there is no marriage in Heaven so why the guy would have a girl "given" to him I'm not sure.
5) Judging by Habakkuk 2:15 there's a curse on those giving others strong drink, meaning God wouldn't give the guy beer.
6) Punishment involves the Lake of Fire, the opposite is Heaven. The Bible speaks even of Hell as being separated by a gulf that no man can cross (Luke 16:26). It nowhere speaks of punishment in Heaven.
And to top it all off, isn't blasphemy against God specificially?
1) Where does the idea of halos enter into in the Bible?
2) Why would some guy named Patrick be at the entrance? Isn't Christ the One who says "Well done, thou good and faithful servant"?
3) I don't see anything about a pearly gate in the Bible being the point of judgement, rather there's a day of judgement where Christ on the throne judges all, and you enter in if your name is in the Book of Life, else you're cast into the Lake of Fire.
4) Judging by Luke 20:35 there is no marriage in Heaven so why the guy would have a girl "given" to him I'm not sure.
5) Judging by Habakkuk 2:15 there's a curse on those giving others strong drink, meaning God wouldn't give the guy beer.
6) Punishment involves the Lake of Fire, the opposite is Heaven. The Bible speaks even of Hell as being separated by a gulf that no man can cross (Luke 16:26). It nowhere speaks of punishment in Heaven.
And to top it all off, isn't blasphemy against God specificially?
jzyehoshua, the topic says its a Joke
No offence, I respect every religion. Take it lightly.. I m sure, "Brown bear" also has nothing against it. Its just supposed to be a joke. So laugh it off 
#7
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Posted 11 August 2005 - 04:06 AM
Even jokes can be taken seriously, right? It raised some serious Biblical issues that I thought it would be interesting to bring up. *shrugs*
#8
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Posted 18 August 2005 - 11:48 PM
Quote
Brown bear, on Jul 20 2005, 12:45 AM, said:
A guy called Steve dies and goes to heaven. He is stood at the pearly gate and recieved a harp and a halo off St. Patrick. He enters heaven and sees many other people with harps and halos, but one man had something diffrent. He had a keg of beer and a gorgeous naked woman with him. Steve was furious, all he got was a harp and a halo. So steve visits St. Patrick complaining about the man. St. Patrick reassures Steve and tells him this man is being punished. Steve cant believe what he is hearing, how is that a punishment? St. Patrick explains, Well the beer barrel has a hole in it and the woman doesnt!
REALLY FUNNY!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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