7 replies to this topic

[semeticsister]

Okay so I have a really awkward situation that I'm facing with this guy:
So his name is Kevin, and we've known eachother for two years. We've been at the same school and have almost all the same classes. He is really funny and has a great personality, but we're friends, and nothing more. I'm not attracted to him at all, and I really couldn't see myself dating him. So last night I was at a party, and Kevin was there, too. We all gathered into one big circle and started playing truth or dare (how juvenile, I know). This one girl named Ali asked be truth or dare, and i picked dare. She dared me to kiss Kevin on the lips. I said that I wouldn't because I just didn't want to, and Kevin was already next to me, waiting for the kiss. I kept saying no that I wouldn't, and then after about five minutes of everyone badgering me to do it, we moved on.

Over the course of the party, I got dared to kiss him oh, about ten times, and I didn't do it any of those times. To complicate things further, my crush was at that party.

So my dilemma is, what should I do next time I see Kevin at school (which isn't for another week since I'm on spring break)? I know for a fact that there is going to be some awkward tension between us, but I don't want that to destroy our friendship. What should I say to Kevin when he asks me why I didn't kiss him?

I really, really need help!!! I don't know what to do, I've never been in a situation like this!

[jlhaslip]

Well that is certainly a shining star in the abyss of teen culture. With all the problems of teenage pregnancy and rampant promiscuity we have at least one member with a sense of decency. Good for you to not kiss him.
As for how to handle meeting up with him for the first time, I would simply continue to interact with him as if the party event had never occurred. Let him bring it up in conversation first. He will only raise the issue if he is concerned enough about it to discuss it openly. Your first reaction should be to deflect the conversation by light-heartedly make a humourous passing reference to let him know that it was not an issue to be taken seriously and if he is adamant about having you explain why you didn't think him worthy of meeting the dare, simply explain that your moral upbringing doesn't include such random flirtuous acts of public affection.
As time passes, anyone who witnessed the scene will consider it a solid show of a positive attitude and good moral upbringing on your part. Anyone who thinks otherwise is dealing with lesser values than you displayed. IMHO.

[misere]

I've had something like that happen to me before, and generally, unless this guy is one of your best friends, or more precisely, he considers you one of his best friends, he wouldn't dare to ask you. He'd just pretend like it never happened, since his ego wouldn't be able to take the blow that a girl refused to kiss him, even on a dare.

But if he should happen to turn around one day and actually ask you, it's fairly probable that he's attracted to you. Actually, I'd say that he probably is really attracted to you, since you said that he was right next to you ready for a kiss when you were dared to kiss him. Unless he's really understanding and he values your friendship with him over just wanting to go out with you, it's going to be nearly impossible for you to tell him the truth without wrecking things between you.

That, or you could lie and just tell him that you weren't very comfortable kissing someone in front of so many people. Or that you had a cold and didn't want to pass anything to him.

[lawmatchmaker]

semeticsister, on Mar 26 2006, 01:59 PM, said:

Okay so I have a really awkward situation that I'm facing with this guy:
So his name is Kevin, and we've known eachother for two years. We've been at the same school and have almost all the same classes. He is really funny and has a great personality, but we're friends, and nothing more. I'm not attracted to him at all, and I really couldn't see myself dating him. So last night I was at a party, and Kevin was there, too. We all gathered into one big circle and started playing truth or dare (how juvenile, I know). This one girl named Ali asked be truth or dare, and i picked dare. She dared me to kiss Kevin on the lips. I said that I wouldn't because I just didn't want to, and Kevin was already next to me, waiting for the kiss. I kept saying no that I wouldn't, and then after about five minutes of everyone badgering me to do it, we moved on.

Over the course of the party, I got dared to kiss him oh, about ten times, and I didn't do it any of those times. To complicate things further, my crush was at that party.

So my dilemma is, what should I do next time I see Kevin at school (which isn't for another week since I'm on spring break)? I know for a fact that there is going to be some awkward tension between us, but I don't want that to destroy our friendship. What should I say to Kevin when he asks me why I didn't kiss him?

I really, really need help!!! I don't know what to do, I've never been in a situation like this!

Its preety simple really. If he can't take what has happened like a man and just laugh it off, than you should avoid him till he gets a grip and move on in life. I think that both you and him need to grow up. Things like what happened occurs to almost everyone, so the thing to do is just move on and get back to the more important things in life. If you don't like the guy, don't give him false hope, tell him in his face, but don't lead him on.

[tuddy]

lawmatchmaker, on Jul 31 2006, 01:52 AM, said:

If you don't like the guy, don't give him false hope, tell him in his face, but don't lead him on.

Wow, there really is hope out there for us guys not to be lead on everytime by alot of chicks, once in the relationshisp, then guys become more to blame i think.

Anyway, back to topic, just deal with it as it comes, i mean, same thing happened with me 4 weeks ago, i refused to play cause thats the only *BLEEP* they would come up with, kiss someone else as a dare, and they were 15/16! I'm 18, so i backed off!... We are all still friends now, so they'll live...

[iGuest]

Ok, I know how you feel. Its going to be ok. If he asks just tell the trueth. You cant go wrong with it. Just tell him that you did not want to, because you were afraid it could ruin your friendship. Or what the reasons were. Don't tell him about the other guy, it might hurt him a little. I don't know your standards but if you are ever asked to kiss anyone again, say no because if he is there and you said yes to anyone else except if he is your bf, then he would really feel bad. But if he is as cool as you say then you have nothing to worry about. And if someone else asks you in front of him. Just come back with. "why are you asking an awkard question?" " I wont answer such an awkard question." just say stuff like that. And don't look flustered. And watch your body language.

-reply by Tricia Crook

[iGuest]

uh...yikes...
Extremely Awkward Situation

I love how eveyones responses were just about three times as awkward as the situation itself...And I knoooow that this was posted like two years ago...But seriously? I think she passed the most awkward passage of the journey when she ****ing denyed him 11 times


...Uh...Yikes...Geeez...

-reply by clock king