14 replies to this topic

[brainless]

I just read in another thread (about how to say "I love you" in other languages than english) that someone in here doesn't say it because it "gets tossed around too often".

I think it is not being said (or at least thought) often enough. Why? I'll try to explain:

At least among many people I know, saying "I love you" implies "I want sexual contact with you". If someone says "I love you" to gain sexual contact, I agree with those who claim that these three words are being tossed around too much - if you want sex without any commitments, why don't you say so?

Quote

Oxford Advanced Learner's of Current English
love 1) have strong affection or deep tender feelings for [someone] 2) [...] 3) have kind feelings towards [someone] [...] 4) be very fond of; like; find pleasure in [something] [...]

I agree with those who think that it is not necessary to have a strong affection or deep feelings to everyone but I do think that most places could be more bearable if everyone loved (as in 3) the people around him or her. I often do things I would not do out of personal motivation because I'd like to see someone suffer less or have an easier life. I'm not saying that I'm going totally out of my way to please someone else, it's just that I take some seconds to keep a door open for someone else, offer help if I'm not busy myself and I've always got an ear open for other people's feelings and problems. I consider "Person X had a problem" an acceptable excuse for not having done something less important or for getting less sleep than I'd need to be fully able to work the next day.
I also don't easily hurt or injure other people. They've got their own problems to worry about, why should I add to them?

I think all this can be summarized as in: "3) have kind feelings towards" other people.

Edited by brainless, 08 June 2006 - 10:22 PM.

[amhso]

its just a phrase adopted by the modern societies to prove one's affection. there's nothing wrong with that.

sure you shiould love everyone. but it's not restricted to that to use the phrase.

[Madkat-Z]

Quote

At least among many people I know, saying "I love you" implies "I want sexual contact with you". If someone says "I love you" to gain sexual contact, I agree with those who claim that these three words are being tossed around too much - if you want sex without any commitments, why don't you say so?

Ah alas our modern society destroying language once again. Awhile back the word "peep" meant those marshmallow chicks you buy around Easter, now it means the same thing as "friend" and "homie" as well. The phrase "I love you" has changed as well. It use to mean what you stated, "A kind feeling towards a person", now it meaning has become less and less serious (I believe its caused by the increases in break ups among couples) causing it to be used in that sort of manner. Love is a feeling, not an action.

[dirtylobster]

brainless, on Jun 9 2006, 01:20 AM, said:

I'm not saying that I'm going totally out of my way to please someone else, it's just that I take some seconds to keep a door open for someone else, offer help if I'm not busy myself and I've always got an ear open for other people's feelings and problems. I consider "Person X had a problem" an acceptable excuse for not having done something less important or for getting less sleep than I'd need to be fully able to work the next day.

I think that's a good definition of love. Or compassion. And I agree that 'I love you' today is more of a phrase you use to tell someone you need them. But it's also a matter of where and when it's used. On the other hand, if you really love someone you shouldn't need to tell him/her that, at least not all the time. Your actions should make it obvious.

[CarlU]

haha, in school my mates used to always say "Oh, I love this Girl" when in reality that girl was the most attractive girl in the school and the guy had barely talked to her.

[Johnny]

Love implies a commitment, much stronger than just dating. It's one thing to be in a high school relationship just to have fun, hang out, and be sort of like friends with benefits, and it's another thing to be 'in love' with someone and want to spend the rest of your life with them.

[Juhae]

You say that people do not say "I love you" enough? I disagree. Saying three words has no true meaning unless if you really mean it. You should only say those three amazing words if and only you are sure that the person you are saying it to, says "I love you" back. That is what really counts. Not how much it is said.

[kawasu]

i dont think what your saying is true either. to a degree yes, but otherwise the phrase is still used vbery appropriately in many cases. for example, if someone were to say it to their child or siblings then it would mean a greater deal than it would to say some1 u'd been seeing for a couple of weeks. love itself has catergories of its own. the love to a friend, parent or brother is a love that is passsive. its not the kind which makes u obsessive or attracted to them but rather loving them for their pressence in life. the love to a partner is that of affection and lust. you love them because your attracted and may well just want say it for sexual contact. then again, you may also love them truly, that is, u love them for who they are... i'm confusing myself. i think i made sense. well yeh, "i love you" has changed, but it still has its backbone depending on the context of where and what its being used for.

[Nani Cheri]

I think you should only say it when you really reallyy mean it. It is true if you say this too often to your partner it is not special when you say it, because it becomes like an sort of automatic phrase you say. Like on the phone, many people end the conversation with 'love ya!', but that is not special anymore, you dont think when you say it.

I think you should say I love you but not too often and only when you truely mean so. Otherwise you dont seperate the people you love and the people you reallyreally love unconditional, and thats not what we want right.

Why not say I like you to a person you dont really are sure about you love... or to your partner. then you can say at the moments you really need to 'I Love You'

[Dagoth Nereviar]

Apparantly, "luv" is a friendship type, but "love" is more of a relationship type.

But I prefer to atleast try and spell words correctly, so I don't use "luv"