19 replies to this topic

[lawmatchmaker]

Hi guys, I'm in a long distance relationship with a French guy living in Switzerland. And frankly things are not going well. It is already very difficult not being able to see each other face to face , we have to use Skype to talk to each other. And he visited me like 4 months ago than he had to go back to Switzerland to work. Now things are bad between us, he has some financial problems so I sent him about US &50 to help him out and he's like working non stop, he has a day job working at a clinic and at night he does baby sitting, he speaks to me like just 5 mins a day. When I ask him not to do his baby sitting, he says he needs to because of the money...but later he admitted he did the baby sitting for free because he liked the people, so in a way he's secrificing our relationship for the baby sitting because we hardly ever get to speak any more. I've already been in this relationship for 1.5 years and I really don't know what to do about it. Should I admit defeat and just break it off...or should I struggle on? I just don't seemto matter to him any more, and when I complain to him, he just says hes tired and offs skype on me.

[LocalSeer]

Being in the Navy we get a lot of statistics and training on keeping together when we are at sea for 6 months at a time. The main key is communication and whenever you can set up a huge romantic vacation. If the guy isn't willing to do that, then I suggest you find someone better for yourself. Cause it'll just get worse unless you fix it and open up talking again, thats the secret and you can't do it with just one person. I'm sorry hun, but its hard and both parts need to be working together to keep it alive. Good luck.

[husker]

I don't think you should give up yet, but I think you should keep an eye open and maybe see if there's a better option for you. But, if you really like him a lot, just keep trying and don't give up.

[tuddy]

Long Distance Relationships can tell you a lot about your love for someone, if you can both overcome the distance, and still see each other, and be going strong after months/years then you have a great bond.

It can take its toll those, you dont have someone there to hold you when things get rough. You can't easily talk etc. So make sure you treat it very careful.

[yellowhairedguy20]

I would sit down and have a talk with him. Tell him that he needs to make time for you or else you will end it. If he chooses his work over you, you should probably end it. If he truly cares about you, he will make the right choice and decide to spend more time with you.

[OpaQue]

The main question you have to ask yourself is...

How long have you been in this relationship ?
Do you feel it strong enough from both ends?
Do you trust him?
Do you see a bright future with him ?
How much do you think, he respects you ?
What do you think he would had done if your positions were interchanged?

Here.. I am commenting and giving you some questions which can help you answer your "Questions". Try thinking logically and you might find it easy to know your answer.

Here I have just laid down some things which came up my mind. Things like nature, age, character etx are very important.. So, frame your questions accordingly. And take your decision wisely. :-)

[PmH]

You really need to call him up, or use skype again, and sit down and talk about this. Tell him everything that's on your mind, communication is key (saw that being posted throughout this topic), and I really agree, if something is going to keep you together, then it's communication.

But you've also got to be real with yourself, if you're getting serious about having a relationship with this guy, then you two can't always live so far away, so he has to show that he is willing to move for you, or let you move to his place, because if not, then this relationship will go nowhere. You can't be this far away from each other forever. Secondly, you also need to see this guy face to face plan a vacation or a trip or something so that you can see him, finding flights with short notice is hard, so hopefully you'll get lucky there.

Then you've gotta sit down and really think about what it is you love about this guy, what it is that kept you two together for 1.5 years, and what it is that will keep you two together for another 1.5 years, and then another, and then another for the rest of your lives. See if there's enough between you two, see if there's enough to form a strong, lasting relationship. If you feel there isn't, then why waste your time and money on a dead end.

I know it might sound harsh, and it might be hard to dump the man. But if you feel if there's no future with you two, then there really is no need to carry on and stress yourself with this long distance relationships. Distance relationships are very hard to maintain, and 1.5 years is very good, I'm impressed, so it's obvious that this isn't any normal relationship.

I hope everything works out for the best!!

[iGuest]

Long distance relationship
Long Distance Relationship

Hello,
I need some help please
I am in a long distance relationship( different countries) for 1 year now.We had a problem about being able to meet when we started and we decided to be just friends. Three months later we started talking again about meeting and this time we decided we will go ahead with the relationship, no matter how far we are apart. We talk everyday and text each other most of the time.This guy told me he will be visiting me six months from now, and he is trying to find admission in the school I am so we could be together. He has known and met my sister face to face and he told my sister that he likes me and he cant wait to get married to me.Now my worries are, I think of this guy all the time and sometimes I think of my heart,because I don't want to be heartbroken in case he doesn't make it here.I don't have enough money to pay him a visit, because I have no source of income. Sometimes I think how should I make him happy and make him see I appreciate his effort of coming to see me ( since it will be our first time meeting). Any advice please is welcomed.

-question by dinesen

[iGuest]

need help:S:SLong Distance Relationship

five years ago I was living in the states but then I moved to ksa with my family for their work. a few months ago, I met this awsome guy and we became friends. But about a month ago, we both noticed that we like eachother. now we're both living in the same country, and we talk everyday. About a couple of days ago, we were disucssing were we are in the realtionship and he said he loved me. My mom studied pshycology and she met himLOL and told me that he was honest and the thing is I am in love wiith him too. The problem is that in a year or two I am going back to the states with my bro and mom for college. We don't know whats gonna happen then and we've both been worrying about how our relationship will continue. He's trying to get a visa or greencard or whatever it is to go there and work there so he can stay with me. (the thing is we are really serious about our relationship and we get along very well) I seriously don't know what to do, I have to go to college, but what if he cant go to america? I definitely can;t leave him behind. Plese people gemme advice:S:S 

-question by abby

 

[iGuest]

I have been in a long distance relationship for about 5 months. My girlfriend and I have ben dating for almost 2 years. my girlfriend lives in holland for school and I am in canada. I went to visit her at the end of october and she is coming home for a few months in about ten days. However I have noticed since she went back to holland from her christmas in polland she has stopped calling me as much. should I be worried? all her friends are guys. I trust her but I find it weird because her habits have all of a sudden changed.  she always cal last led before she went to sleep but now she hasnt for the last week,  I find it weird or am I weird? your thoughts anyone?

-question by chris