4 replies to this topic

[kudmus]

I’ve always told myself that I don’t wanna marry a girl from my own race because there are many things I don’t like about us. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not saying those things are bad things. I know they are god because other men leave girls from their races to date girls from my race. I don’t have an inferiority complex, in fact I so proud of my being black but I just find so many things I like in Asian, White and bi-racial girls.

My decision not to marry an African chick was strengthened last Sunday when I discovered just how difficult it is for one to get himself a Zimbabwean girl for a wife. The process is so long and tiresome. Did you know that Zimbabwean men have to pay large amounts of wealth to their inlaw-to-bes before they can be allowed to wed with their loved ones. There are more than a dozen things you have to do and all of them need you to fork out money. Instead of admiring what my brother was doing, when all those things were happeningI couldn't help but tell myself "Dude, u don't want this in your life". If I'm going to mary a native Zimbabwean then I'll know I don't have much control over what I think.

[surbjit]

Well to be honest everybody has the freedom of choice on who they'd like to marry. I know from some religions people are forced to marry people who theyd wish not to marry but simply cannot do anything about it ( I will not name any because i dont name and shame and also its not im my place to say such things in this manner).

You should do what you feel is right , also go for a girl that has feelings for you. Dont chase around other girls that do not have feelings for you as you will find out inside they dont feel anything for you or love you in that case, you would go for a girl that loves you.

In conclusion I think everyone can marry who they'd wish marry (Well people should be allowed but some get forced).

Hope this helps.
surbjit

[tatati]

Really? Is that kind of thing still going on in the 21st century! OMG
Aren't there any exceptions?
What if you fall in love with a girl and want to stay together forever, you wouldn't have much of a choice other than going through all the traditions, so you can be accepted as a couple in your community, right?


After couples marry in Zimbabwe, do the in-laws tend to be intrusive and participate in the couples life much? Would be nice if you pay them to stay away from your business

haha

why do you have to pay them? you are getting their daughter off their hands, their bills are likely to decrease

[Spyda]

kudmus, on Oct 28 2008, 05:09 AM, said:

I’ve always told myself that I don’t wanna marry a girl from my own race because there are many things I don’t like about us. Don’t get me wrong! I’m not saying those things are bad things. I know they are god because other men leave girls from their races to date girls from my race. I don’t have an inferiority complex, in fact I so proud of my being black but I just find so many things I like in Asian, White and bi-racial girls.

My decision not to marry an African chick was strengthened last Sunday when I discovered just how difficult it is for one to get himself a Zimbabwean girl for a wife. The process is so long and tiresome. Did you know that Zimbabwean men have to pay large amounts of wealth to their inlaw-to-bes before they can be allowed to wed with their loved ones. There are more than a dozen things you have to do and all of them need you to fork out money. Instead of admiring what my brother was doing, when all those things were happeningI couldn't help but tell myself "Dude, u don't want this in your life". If I'm going to mary a native Zimbabwean then I'll know I don't have much control over what I think.

I think you should be able to choose who you want to marry. If you do not want to marry a Zimbabwean girl, then that's your choice. I myself wouldn't want to marry one either if I was also forced to pay that much money to my inlaws of all people

[kudmus]

Quote

What if you fall in love with a girl and want to stay together forever, you wouldn't have much of a choice other than going through all the traditions, so you can be accepted as a couple in your community, right?

U're right there is no choice. You either have to go through that or you stay with their child without their approval. In our culture that is extremely dangerous. If she falls ill or dies(which becomes more likely in those cases) , you and your family can be in for it. Believe it or not: If you are not a christian you'll have to pay them more than paying for five two wives if their daughter dies while she was "illegally" staying with you. You'll have what we call ngozi(spirits that will follow you and bring bad luck upon your family.

It really not easy being a native Zimbabwean.

If you guys want to hear more about Zim I'll have to set up a site and tell you more

Quote

After couples marry in Zimbabwe, do the in-laws tend to be intrusive and participate in the couples life much? Would be nice if you pay them to stay away from your business

Not really. The only thing I can say about the inlaws is there will be a great distance between you and your mother in law. Some guys can't even great their mom-in-laws by handshakes. They go some meters away and squat, then they ask MIL how she is. I hate that and if I ever marry a Zimbo her mom will have nto adjust