13 replies to this topic

[akira550]

Hello guys I want to share my problems here so that I am not the only one who keep this and not to have difficulties regarding this problem of mine of someone will read my story and suggest what I need to do.

I do love a girl very much, She is a good and nice girl, we are best friends since young I know her family
and she knows my family too one time I just felt that I love this girl but I can't tell it because of lack of self confidence
and I am afraid to say that I love her because we are best friends and I don't want to break that relationship because
I know what will happen if I say that I love her. One day I am in a tree sitting down and reading some books
it is about love and I learned there that if you love someone you must say it before you regret it and life is too short,
So I think very carefully and decided to tell her what I feels about her.

I invited her in a date and she agrees but she knew that it is only a friendly date then In a park where we are the only persons there
I don't know why? maybe peoples are busy. So I tell her what I feel, I tell her that I love her so much and She begun to ask so much questions, and I answered most of them but some aren't like "Why did you love me?" I answered but its not specific, because love has no reason and I can't think of any reason why do I. I only knew that someone in my heart is whispering me or telling me to love her.
Then she suddenly walk away and left me mmm I don't know why..

I texted her and she said that we can't be together because of we are not in the same religion because it was their rules and tradition,
I am so mad not to God but in their religion because there is no testament or book saying that people with defferent religion can't love each other man! So I don't know what to do with it.. I really love that girl but you know I can feel that she also do love me
yes because she is so sweet she still going to meet me in person even though I say that I love her. She cares for me all the time and I can feel it I don't know if its love maybe she is just trap in the rules of their religion.

I said to her that she don't have the freedom and why won't she get her freedom and let herself control herself am I wrong?
please help me what I am going to do? I love her infinite times more than my life but I can't do anything

[Zagubadu·]

akira550, on Feb 7 2010, 02:34 AM, said:

So I don't know what to do with it.. I really love that girl but you know I can feel that she also do love me

Not wanting to be the one that crushes everything your feeling. But as far as I can tell if someone loves, truly.....TRULY loves someone they don't care what others think. Kind of like the story of Romeo and Juliet their families were enemies or something like that. So their love was forbidden but they did it anyways. See what I think and don't take what I say to heart because what do I know! I'm no relationship expert, but I think is that if she really loved you she would tell you and would be with you regardless of what her family thought.

[akira550]

Zagubadu·, on Feb 7 2010, 07:48 AM, said:

Not wanting to be the one that crushes everything your feeling. But as far as I can tell if someone loves, truly.....TRULY loves someone they don't care what others think. Kind of like the story of Romeo and Juliet their families were enemies or something like that. So their love was forbidden but they did it anyways. See what I think and don't take what I say to heart because what do I know! I'm no relationship expert, but I think is that if she really loved you she would tell you and would be with you regardless of what her family thought.

one more thing my friend I've got a problem seeing her because of her mother when her mother know that I love her daughter she manage and tell to her and to me that we can't go see each other and also we can't love each other that's very awful for me because her mother who was the friend of my mother say that to me, even though I am not mad with them because they are just following the rules my point is what was that rule? there's nothing bad in loving someone right? so why must command her daughter to not to see me anymore.. well not like Romeo and Juliet we won't die I'll go fight for what I feel I don't want to suicide. I want to live with her

[FouGilang]

Same problems, dude. I too once have that feeling in love to someone in different religion. Though it is I who think that we should not be together because of that problem, since she is the kind of person who doesn't think too much about religous stuffs...

But then again, the question is, are you ready for it? what i'm talking about is The differences. The differences of the way of thinking, the religious view (the heat of religious fights are not so far from the believes vs non believers) , the praying schedule, and your children religion? There are too much problem will occur when you're living together with someone who has different view and being stubborn at it. Something like tradition and religion aren't something that can be easily forgotten by just saying 'freedom'

If you do really love her, i suggest you not to push her, and don't push your luck either
You can try to meet her parents and ask them about this rules and tradition stuff, then meet your parents and ask them about that too.
But yeah, even if you managed to win the debates about the rules, think again. If she don't want it, don't push her for it.

Indeed, there's no books or statements on the government that people can't be with someone who has different religions with him/her. But People in other hands are trying to prevent the problem it can cause.

[akira550]

FouGilang, on Feb 7 2010, 09:09 AM, said:

Same problems, dude. I too once have that feeling in love to someone in different religion. Though it is I who think that we should not be together because of that problem, since she is the kind of person who doesn't think too much about religous stuffs...

But then again, the question is, are you ready for it? what i'm talking about is The differences. The differences of the way of thinking, the religious view (the heat of religious fights are not so far from the believes vs non believers) , the praying schedule, and your children religion? There are too much problem will occur when you're living together with someone who has different view and being stubborn at it. Something like tradition and religion aren't something that can be easily forgotten by just saying 'freedom'

If you do really love her, i suggest you not to push her, and don't push your luck either
You can try to meet her parents and ask them about this rules and tradition stuff, then meet your parents and ask them about that too.
But yeah, even if you managed to win the debates about the rules, think again. If she don't want it, don't push her for it.

Indeed, there's no books or statements on the government that people can't be with someone who has different religions with him/her. But People in other hands are trying to prevent the problem it can cause.

Yes I am ready for it, I am ready to transfer religion since her religion is all about christ also so we are at the same.
We are the same praising christ and about the differences, I can manage it because when you love a person differences don't matter poor, rich, ugly, pretty well that's not matter and not that important into me. well as you said that you are the one who let the one you love get away so what I am going to say to you my friend is you didn't give your best and you didn't fight for what you want.
I am not pushing her to love me, I don't care if she don't want me, its ok with me all important is I love her and I am loving someone there's no need in return all I want is to let me love her that's my point let me show how much I love her and what can I do. yeah that is bad about tradition, there's no tradition at all those tradition are just human made and human thinking which is not I believe! if tradition will block my way to love, its not fair... if someone thinks that tradition is a big block into love, why did God love all of us? even though all of us are in the different religion? even atheist... because I am an atheist in my past and I saw that God Loves me. as you said there is no books or statements saying that people with different religions can't love each other

[onkarnath2001]

akira550, on Feb 7 2010, 01:04 PM, said:

Hello guys I want to share my problems here so that I am not the only one who keep this and not to have difficulties regarding this problem of mine of someone will read my story and suggest what I need to do.

I do love a girl very much, She is a good and nice girl, we are best friends since young I know her family
and she knows my family too one time I just felt that I love this girl but I can't tell it because of lack of self confidence
and I am afraid to say that I love her because we are best friends and I don't want to break that relationship because
I know what will happen if I say that I love her. One day I am in a tree sitting down and reading some books
it is about love and I learned there that if you love someone you must say it before you regret it and life is too short,
So I think very carefully and decided to tell her what I feels about her.

I invited her in a date and she agrees but she knew that it is only a friendly date then In a park where we are the only persons there
I don't know why? maybe peoples are busy. So I tell her what I feel, I tell her that I love her so much and She begun to ask so much questions, and I answered most of them but some aren't like "Why did you love me?" I answered but its not specific, because love has no reason and I can't think of any reason why do I. I only knew that someone in my heart is whispering me or telling me to love her.
Then she suddenly walk away and left me mmm I don't know why..

I texted her and she said that we can't be together because of we are not in the same religion because it was their rules and tradition,
I am so mad not to God but in their religion because there is no testament or book saying that people with defferent religion can't love each other man! So I don't know what to do with it.. I really love that girl but you know I can feel that she also do love me
yes because she is so sweet she still going to meet me in person even though I say that I love her. She cares for me all the time and I can feel it I don't know if its love maybe she is just trap in the rules of their religion.

I said to her that she don't have the freedom and why won't she get her freedom and let herself control herself am I wrong?
please help me what I am going to do? I love her infinite times more than my life but I can't do anything

yes i admit that religion is a big wall between a boy and a girl in love but it is not true for all the countries of the world.like a country USA ,it is not true but a country like india is never an expection in this very field.If you want a detailed description of the statement ,better you read the novel written by chetan bhagat TWO STATES.
"LOVE MARRIAGE IS SIMPLE AROUND THE WORLD
boy loves girl,girl loves boy and they get married but in india if is a it longer,love should be there in betweeen the families of the two laso then only the marriage is possible..
so,,,ur statement ios quiet true.

[akira550]

onkarnath2001, on Feb 7 2010, 01:17 PM, said:

yes i admit that religion is a big wall between a boy and a girl in love but it is not true for all the countries of the world.like a country USA ,it is not true but a country like india is never an expection in this very field.If you want a detailed description of the statement ,better you read the novel written by chetan bhagat TWO STATES.
"LOVE MARRIAGE IS SIMPLE AROUND THE WORLD
boy loves girl,girl loves boy and they get married but in india if is a it longer,love should be there in betweeen the families of the two laso then only the marriage is possible..
so,,,ur statement ios quiet true.

not only in india but in all asian countries but some don't have the tradition Filipinos attitude of fix marrieds came from chinese
which is bad in my eyesight because you will love someone that you don't love and you will need to follow your parents instead of your heart like my problem maybe someday I can find a way so that this traditions will be break, maybe but it is hard to destroy
an ethnic traditions and will take long

[Spudd]

Depends on what you mean. Yes, it is quite possible to love someone who is of another religion, there's no doubt about that. However, if we're talking about in a relationship, particularly a long term one, it can cause major problems depending on how far apart the two religions are. I personally don't think, for example, that a relationship between a devout Christian and an atheist can work. How can you stand to marry someone, spend the rest of your life with someone, and love someone so deeply, knowing that in the end you'll be in eternal paradise without them. And the atheist, of course, will have to sit through church, and be there for their spouse without infringing on their beliefs. It can be a major wedge between relationships. That's why I think that two people should be of the same religion (or lack thereof) or at least very close to the same religion. (E.g. Baptist and Evangelical, practically the same.) And a huge mistake to make is to expect to convert someone mid-relationship, which almost never works.

[akira550]

Spudd, on Feb 7 2010, 08:39 PM, said:

Depends on what you mean. Yes, it is quite possible to love someone who is of another religion, there's no doubt about that. However, if we're talking about in a relationship, particularly a long term one, it can cause major problems depending on how far apart the two religions are. I personally don't think, for example, that a relationship between a devout Christian and an atheist can work. How can you stand to marry someone, spend the rest of your life with someone, and love someone so deeply, knowing that in the end you'll be in eternal paradise without them. And the atheist, of course, will have to sit through church, and be there for their spouse without infringing on their beliefs. It can be a major wedge between relationships. That's why I think that two people should be of the same religion (or lack thereof) or at least very close to the same religion. (E.g. Baptist and Evangelical, practically the same.) And a huge mistake to make is to expect to convert someone mid-relationship, which almost never works.

hey I remembered an atheist who loved a girl and become a christian that was my granny and till now they are loving each other
no argues about God, because they don't want to be apart. What I mean is that they love each other no matter what till death do their part in my situation its much easy because the girl I love is also a christian but different religion we all know that there are many christians but different religion what I mean protestant and catholic, I am a catholic and she is a protestant and that makes our world
in trouble which is I hate, the bad rules.. ezekiel didn't said or mention something about don't love a person that have differences to youinstead God wants us to love our differences or enemies.

Anyway I would like to thank all of you who reply and commented in this topic thus its not that clear at least you give your best guys to help me in this kind of problem silly me, thank you so much I' know you guys will gonna help and comment here. I have decided and I want to fight not just to give her up

[OpaQue]

This is soooo much common in India man, with 100's of religions and languages and thousands of castes... its a big big time headache for lovers! Issues like this are responsible for suicides, homicides etc. Hardly 20% of the population will tolerate love marriages between different religions. In India, before the marriage, the families of boy n girl, both meet and know each other. Each will use all their strength to get all information about each other and then with a big festival the marriage happens. Unlike modern marriages where a few hundred people gather, In villages, a marriage calls atleast 5000-10,000 people and the ceremony lasts for a week. The family(usually the girls family) has to take care of all the guests throughout the marriage.

If all the politics doesn't work, then the boy makes the bold decision of running away with the girl. love marriages do happen and somehow the lovebirds manage to make their sweet heaven in some corner of India, safe from the world (their own families). Eventually after 5-10 years, the families accept the relationship. The chances are higher if you have 2 kids.

Dear akira, If you are financially stable on your own - then be prepared for the worst i.e. taking the chick and running away. With that in mind, just go ahead and tell her that you dont care of the world. Talk it out with the girls family. If that does not work, run away. They are your parents, they will accept you soon or later. As for changing the religion and stuff, keep that part later.. change the religion for yourself and not for others. Nor you or your chick needs to change religions man. Its insane. It simply throws water on all the acts you did out of faith to your religion.